A Faith Beyond Feeling

It seems the term "Dark night of the Soul" coined by St. John of the Cross in the 16th century has become for some a trite synonym for not feeling it with God.  "God I'm just not feeling it.  I need a goose-bump, Holy Spirit quiver...hook a brotha up!"  But what if the last frontier of faith is utter absence?  In the moments before Jesus' death we are told that he cried from the cross, "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?"  I have begun to wonder if our own faith journey should be leading to that moment as well.

C.S. Lewis once stated that he longed for "not my idea of God, but God."  We have all created ideas of God.  Some of them are packaged and marketed by companies and industries while others take on names like Methodist, Baptist, conservative, liberal, or charismatic.  Our culture both in and outside the church is feverishly manufacturing an emotional, experiential "God."  Our ultimate reality, purpose and meaning has become dictated by feelings, emotive moments, or spiritualized encounters.  In such a societal/church culture, how do we reconcile the words of Mother Teresa, "He has destroyed everything in me.  The only thing that keeps me on the surface - is obedience."

I don't think Abraham was feeling it when he tied Isaac to a wooden altar; I don't think Moses was feeling it when he spent decades in exile; I don't think David was feeling it when Absalom usurped his throne; I don't think Jesus was feeling it when he sweat blood in Gethsemane.

I wonder if I am willing to sacrifice my intimacy, my experience, my feeling, my idea of God for God?  I wonder if I am willing to one day say, "My God, my God why have you forsaken me?"

10 Reasons to Follow Jesus

10. Meaning (that's bigger than a pay-check)
9.   Purpose (that lasts beyond a lifetime)
8.   Hope (that ain't a wish list but a future promise)
7.   Joy (that's more than a buzz, a one-night stand, or a house in the Hamptons)
6.   Mercy (that ain't wrist breaking make you say "uncle," but heart-wrenching cleanse your funky soul)
5.   Forgiveness (that's genuine, to the bone, deep, dark get your skeletons out the closet)
4.   Peace (that's more than a mantra of "Oms")
3.   Liberation (that's addiction breaking, bondage busting)
2.   Re-birth (that's night and day "what happened to the a##hole I use to call my husband?")
1.  Love (that's look-death-in-the-face, lay-it-all-on-the-line unconditional)

What are your reasons?

10 Reasons Not to be a Christian

10.The Crusades
9.  The Inquisitions
8.  The History of Europe (Church as State is a scary thing see #9)
7.  The Partnership of Colonization and Christian Missions (for centuries - hello Africa)
6.  The Church's Treatment of the Gay Community
5.  The Silence of the Vatican and much of the Protestant Church During the Holocaust
4.  The Vatican's Handling of Child Sexual Abuse
3.  The Politicization of Christianity in America (the Moral Majority not so much WWJD)
2.  The Hypocrisy of Christians (guilty as charged)
1.  Jesus Meant It (Love your enemy, Blessed are the peacemakers, the meek shall inherit the earth...)

What are your reasons?

The Worship Myth

There is a myth that has been circulating for decades and centuries.  It doesn't involve Nessie, Big Foot, or chanting "Bloody Mary."  The myth involves an hour (for some more) on Sunday.  This pervasive myth is referred to as the Worship Myth, and at it's simplest it states that the worship service is the foundation of the church and its ministry in the world.  To start, grow, or go to church is equivalent to getting people to gather in as large a crowd as possible to sing songs about God and to listen to a gifted communicator (sometimes) talk about God (hopefully).  Ask most church planters in the United States about starting a church and they will give you a recipe about getting your launch team together, preparing your monthly preview services, and finally launching your %ss-kicking multi-media "worship experience!"  Lady Gaga ain't got s!#t on the show we put on each Sunday in the East Shore Elementary School Cafeteria.  Ask an established church pastor about church growth and he or she will probably launch into adding a new building for their "eco-friendly-accoustic-only-modern" worship service, or adding another campus, or investing in tech upgrades for their stadium-seating worship center/sanctuary.  Ask most church members about going to church and they will respond with their personal dimensions, "I go to the 10am ancient-future service on the South Campus in my v-neck T and skinny jeans."

The problem with the Worship Myth is that it ignores the teachings of Jesus in Matthew 28:18-20 in which Jesus commanded his disciples to do as he had done which was to make disciples.  Jesus never explicity commanded his followers to worship.  Rather he commanded his followers to baptize and teach people to obey all that he commanded.  And what did Jesus command?  To love the Lord your God with all of heart, soul, mind, and strength and to love your neighbor as you love yourself.  For Jesus the role and function of the church was to make disciples who didn't merely worship him for an hour on Sunday, but who worshipped him 24/7 as they began to look and act more like him in their homes, in their neighborhoods, in their jobs, and in their communities.

What might our homes, our communities, and our world look like if the church decided to invest as much time, energy, and money in helping people look and act more like Jesus the other 167 hours of the week?              

Night Lights

Over the past few weeks, I have twice been startled awake by the repeated cries, "Dad!  Daaaaaaad!  Daaaaaaad!"  On both occassions, I rushed into my five-year-old's room to find him cocooned in his top bed sheet, a chrysalis of tears and whimpers. 

"What's wrong buddy?"
"I'm scared."
"What are you scared of?"
"The dark."

My first thought, "Me too."  I not ashamed to admit, I'm scared of the dark.  I'm scared of the darkness of cancer and terminal illness.  I'm scared of the darkness of genocide and repressive violence.  I'm scared of the darkness of global sex-trafficking.  I'm scared of the darkness of starvation and poverty.  I'm scared of the darkness of foreclosure, bankrupcy and economic ruin.  Mostly, I'm scared of the darkness in my own heart.

The day after my son's first cry in the dark we bought him a spaceship night light.  After the second, we agreed to let him keep his door open through the night.

Of late I've been crying out in the night, "Dad!  Daaaaaaad!  Daaaaaaad!"  The darkness has closed in, but I'm once again discovering those well-worn words, "Light of the world you stepped down into darkness opened my eyes let me see beauty that makes this heart adore You hope of a life spent with You."

A Life More Ordinary

Saturday night I attended my 20 year high school reunion.  In the days leading up to the big event, I couldn't help falling victim to the "Reunion Syndrome."  The Reunion Syndrome is a condition characterized by increased self-reflection about the following: 1. Do I make enough money?  2. Is my house big enough? 3. Is my car adequately luxurious?  4. Does my job afford me position and influence?  5. Are my kids destined for greatness?  The Reunion Syndrome is commonly reffered to as "Jonesing for the Joneses." 

As the Reunion Syndrome took affect, I was surprised and saddened by my degree of Jonesing for the Joneses.  I felt my self-worth rise and fall as I reflected on those standards our society holds so dear - physical beauty, wealth, material possessions, and power.  Eventually a hidden apetite was revealed.  I hungered to be great.  I hungered to be extraordinary.  A shadow of guilt and regret enveloped me as I remembered the words of Mother Teresa, “We cannot do great things on this Earth, only small things with great love.”

At the reunion, I felt awkward.  My attempts at small talk were clumsy, gangly, and uncoordinated like I was in the throws of social puberty.  I did want to know were people lived, if they had a family, and where they worked.  But more than this I wanted to know how they had experienced the presence of God in their lives.  Had they seen God in the birth of a child, an unforeseen tragedy, or an undeserved blessing?  Had they seen God in the mundane and the monotonous or had they too been Jonesing for the Joneses?  Had they too been hungering to be extraordinary?

I wish I could say I were no longer infected with the "Reunion Syndrome."  I wish I could say that my life were filled with small things done with great love.  Maybe just maybe by the next reunion I'll be living a life more ordinary.

Because I Love You

On Sunday May 29th, I preached a sermon that contained a letter that my dad wrote to me 16 years ago a few days after I was arrested for DUI and carrying a concealed weapon.  The second half of the letter is a testament to the type of man my father was.  It reads...

Allen, God has something planned for your life that only YOU can accomplish.  Sometimes I get the feeling you know that and are trying to run from whatever this thing might be.  Allen, you are a special person – you care and care deeply about people and things.  Please don’t throw this gift away by making poor choices.  You know how much I care, we are alike in many ways – maybe that is why I understand and love you so much.

Dad

Following the first worship service, a number of people approached me and thanked me for my transparency and vulnerability.  My story and more importantly my dad's words provided them great hope and comfort.  I left the sanctuary to find a quiet place to regroup and get prepared for the second service.  My emotions were raw and tears began to pool in my eyes as a surge of gratitude coursed through my body.  I could not stop thanking God.  To think that God would use me a one time drunk, womanizer, and criminal to bring hope, comfort, and healing to others was overwhelming.  I asked God, "Why?  Why would you forgive me of all the things I've done and all the pain I've caused?  Why would you change my heart and give me the opportunity to serve you?"  The answer was quick and simple, "Because I love you."

Right now no matter where you are or what you are doing God wants to heal you, he wants to forgive you, he wants to restore you.  He wants nothing more that to give you peace and purpose.  You are never too broken, too battered, or too bad for God to whisper in your ear, "Because I love you." 

   

Hypocrites Inc.

Recently I sold my truck to a young couple in their early twenties.  We spent a few hours together at the young man's credit union finalizing the sale.  We talked about his job with Publix, my job as a pastor, and the many poor choices we had made throughout our lives.  At one point, the young man turned the conversation towards religion or to be more specific why he doesn't attend church.  Quite simply, he doesn't go to church because the Christians he's known have been a bunch of hypocrites.  From his life experience, the church might as well be named Hypocrites Incorporated. 

I reflected on the young man's comments for a few days and the thought occurred to me that value judgements always have a referent upon which they are based.  And the question came to me, "What does it mean when a 'non-believer' makes a value judgement about the church?"

I believe there is a standard and a morality that exists within the heart of humanity which is based upon the longing of an ideal once known but long forgotten.  An echo reverberates through each of us that is more than morality or moral behavior.  As Ravi Zacharias notes, morality is a sign or manifestation of humanity's true purpose - to love God and to love one another.  Non-believers in Christ and atheists alike affirm humanity's inherent purpose when they make value judgements criticizing or critiquing Christians as a bunch of hypocrites.  To say something is lacking or malformed is implicitly a value judgment based upon a referent, standard, or ideal.  Truth be told, an ideal has been buried deep within our existence that we spend our lives trying, hoping, wishing to see expressed or lived out if only for a moment.  On those rare occasions we glimpse its existence something beyond words within our souls says yes (or in Greek Amen)!

The church is full of hypocrites, but there are moments when stale tradition, misguided morality, and exclusive doctrine disappear and the people who follow Jesus reflect a love that won't be labeled, coerced, or withheld.  On those rare occasions, a longing that lives within the heart of each of us finds itself saying Amen!

Oh, if but for a moment we could be such a people.

Why?

Towards the end of April a friend of mine asked if I would come and speak to his son's Cub Scout troop about faith.  I believe the boys were around 10 years old.  I gave a brief spiel about my faith journey (the G-Rated version if such a thing exists) and then opened up the floor for questions.  The boys repeatedly asked in so many words, "Why did God allow sin in the world?"  What an amazing question.  I fumbled around for an answer and made a few stabs at explaining how genuine love is based upon free will, but the boys weren't buying it.  I tried a few analogies that bombed like a pre-schooler taking a physics exam.  The coup de gras was my use of the arranged vs. unarranged marriage image.  Let's just say I provided some serious job security for counselors and therapists in Metro Atlanta.  Since my night scarring the Cub Scouts, I have thought a great deal about the boys' question: "Why did God allow sin in the world?"

The answer begins with my failed attempt to explain the necessity of choice in authentic relationship.  Quite simply coercion is never a healthy foundation for any relationship.  Genuine love cannot be coerced, manipulated, or dictated.  The only way to avoid such abuses is through the freedom of choice.  The only way to ensure the possibility of authentic love is to provide the possibility of its antithesis - "sin." 

In "Christian-speak " or "Jesus-ese," sin is often defined as separation from God.  There are many passages in the Bible that support this view (Isaiah 59:1-2; Matthew 7:23; Garden of Eden; Prodigal Son; Lazarus in Heaven etc..).  I'm pretty much down with the whole "sin as separation" thing because it is fundamentally relational, but it can be a little too light in the pants for my taste.  More accurately sin is cheating on God and then spitting in his face when he catches you.  It is your spouse walking into the bedroom while you are having relations with someone else and then looking your spouse in the eye and telling them to get the hell out of your business.  It is f-ing up a relationship beyond all recognition.  It is betrayal to the point of death - "Et tu, Brute?"

If we put the pieces together we see that God allowed sin in the world in order to allow the possibility of authentic love.  In Shakespearean terms, you can't have Romeo and Juliet without the possibility of Julius Caesar.  I don't know about you but that answer is like eating a bag full of rice cakes.  It looks appetizing but it tastes like styrofoam.  If you are like me and you have experienced or witness tragedy, or abuse, or hell on earth then the "freedom/authentic love" explanation makes sense but it sucks.

Thankfully there is more to the story.  God allowed sin or separation in the world because he had always planned to do something about it (1Peter 1:20).  God has never been passive or constrained.  He didn't create a world based on freedom and choice then call it day.  God actually stepped right into the world he created taking on its frailty, its suffering, and its mortality.  He actually stepped right into the separation taking heaven in one hand and earth in the other.  The God who created a world based on freedom and choice chose to endure the consequence of our infidelity so that we could experience the consequence of his fidelity.  Why did God allow sin in the world?  Because he the betrayed willing filled the chasm of our separation with a love that never asked "why" but only, "Father forgive them for they know not what they do."

This Side of Broken

Which side of broken are you on?  Some days I think I'm on the right-side of broken.  On those days I can laugh freely, love easily, and forgive quickly.  But then there are those other days.  Those left-side of broken days.  On those days I spew venom, reek havoc, and kill the proverbial buzz.  Those left-side days have shadows.  They have memories echoing with guilt and shame.  Those days find despair an easy companion and regret a not so distant friend.  I've come to realize that I can't get from the left to the right side of broken by making a leap.  The only way is through.  Some 2,000 years ago a man started on the left-side of broken. He travelled through torture, humiliation, and death before he came out just right of broken.  I'm afraid the same might be true for me.  A few years ago I stepped into my tragedy, my sorrow, and my dysfunction.  I'm still wading chest-deep in the mire and refuse but I've had moments when I've seen the other side - the right-side of broken.  I've learned that the stink is nearly unbearable and the pain sometimes unthinkable, but there's a man with scars on his hands who leads the way.  Which side of broken are you on?

A Love Unsolicited

A few days ago I was ironing a shirt before heading to work.  My 5 year old was sitting on the couch watching cartoons drinking chocolate milk and my 2 year old was walking around in her footsie pj's dragging her favorite blanket.  I'm not the most adept at ironing, so most of my attention was on the task at hand.  With no provocation from me, my daughter dropped her blanket walked over to me and hugged my left leg.  Moments later she returned for one more hug.  Needless to say she made my day.  Is there anything more powerful than unsolicited, unmitigated, unconditional love?  It is life changing.  My daughter's hugs reminded me that our Father in heaven has shown us his unsolicited, unmitigated, unconditional love through his only begotten Son.  The Bible says that God proves his love for us in that while we were still sinners or enemies of God Christ died for us.  In other words while we were preoccupied with living life on our own terms God embraced us with arms stretched wide - so wide in fact only nails could hold them. 

Is there anything more powerful than unsolicited, unmitigated, unconditional love? 

Hunters and Gatherers

We live in the information age.  Careers and fortunes are won and lost through the acquisition, manipulation, and execution of information.  It's as if we have stepped back many millenia into an age of hunting and gathering.  Our lives depend on information, but our media and technology has accelerated the production and dissemination of information to break-neck speeds.  If we are to succeed in such a world deluged with information then we must become adept at hunting and gathering the pertinent and the essential. 

Furthermore, the development of video technologies along with advances in entertainment have shaped hunters and gathers into oral/visual receivers of information.  Reading has been supplanted by the audio/visual.  No longer the foundation of information acquisition, reading has become a least common denominator skill and tool designed to retrieve the necessary with the least amount of effort. 

Subsequently, people have become adept hunters and gatherers of oral/visual information but terrible farmers of fields upon fields of written information.  The following statistics demonstrate what I mean:

1/3 of high school graduates never read another book for the rest of their lives.

42 percent of college graduates never read another book after college.

80 percent of U.S. families did not buy or read a book last year.

70 percent of U.S. adults have not been in a bookstore in the last five years.

(Source: Jerold Jenkins, http://www.jenkinsgroupinc.com/)

On average, a bookstore browser spends 8 seconds looking at a book's front cover and 15 seconds looking at the back cover.(Source: Para Publishing, http://www.parapub.com/)

Each day in the U.S., people spend 4 hours watching TV, 3 hours listening to the radio and 14 minutes reading magazines.

(Source: Veronis, Suhler & Associates investment banker)

If we live in a world of hunters and gatherers of oral/visual information then why are we trying to do discipleship like we live in a world of farmers?  The overwhelming number of mainline churches promote a program driven model of discipleship that is reading intensive and classroom based.  This farmer approach was effective for generations that preceded the information/technology boom of recent years, but presently it has become a Commadore 64 among iPad 2s.   Advocates of the farmer model can rant and rave about how things "used to"/"should" be, or they can rage against culture, or criticize the church's leadership, or enumerate a litany of other tertiary issues.  But the simple fact remains hunters and gathers don't want to be farmers.  The question for many churches today is whether they are willing to put down their hoes and pick up their spears?
  

Inside-Out Leadership

Recently, I watched my five-year-old son attempt to put on a long sleeve shirt.  The shirt itself was rightside out but the sleevers were inside out.  He easily slid the shirt over his head and down his torso, but he nearly tumbled to the ground countless times trying to force his arms into the inside out sleeves.  What a fitting image for many of our leadership efforts.  Leadership is a balance between preparation and progress.  Without proper preparation our progress becomes an off-balanced lurching and thrusting that exerts a great deal of energy but produces more pain and discomfort than results.  Conversely, extended periods of preparation with limited or no progress produce...well nothing really (these periods of preparation can produce the illusion of progress through conversation and surface level changes).  Leadership is about getting the shirt and the sleeves of our organization rightside out and then putting the shirt on; it is not about cramming our organization into inside out sleeves or getting the sleeves rightside out and never putting on the shirt.  

Is the Church a Temple?

Of late, I have realized that the present day attractional church in America has more in common with the Temple prior to the death and resurrection of Jesus than to the movement which followed.  The Temple in Jerusalem was the center of Israel's world.  It was the sun at the center of Israel's religious solar system.  Yes the razing of the Temple and the Babylonian Captivity reshaped 1st Century Judaism, but the fact remained that the Temple whether literally or metaphorically was the heart of Israel's faith.  It was believed that God dwelled in the Temple, that his very presence was enthroned over the Ark of the Covenant, the Mercy Seat, and the two cherubim (indeed there are numerous Psalms and Scriptures passages that acknowledge the transcendence and omnipresence of God cf. 1Kings 8:27ff; Psalm 139, but the presence of God among humans was directly associated with the Temple as it had been the Tabernacle).  It was "professional" priests from the line of Aaron along with their assistants from the tribe of Levi who performed and executed the rituals of the faith.  This "professional" priesthood or clergy class received their sustenance and compensation from the people to whom they served.  Sound familiar.  For most denominational and non-denominational churches a building is the center of their activity.  Whether explicitly or implicitly, the message is conveyed that the presence of God among humans dwells in the Sanctuary or Worship Center or Educational Wing.  These are "sacred" spaces due honor, reverence, and respect.  The people come to the sacred building where they witness, experierence, and share in rituals delivered by "professional" clergy or priests.  It is the pastor/priest who has been uniquely set apart by God to lead the people into the presence of God.  Such a distinct and sacred calling necessitates that the people being served provide the sustenance and compensation for the pastor/priest.

The church as Temple is the antithesis of the 1st century church.  Fundamentally, the incarnation itself demonstrated that the presence of God had come to tabernacle or dwell among humanity.  The Word became flesh.  Emmanual, God with us, was the Temple (cf. John 2:18ff; Matthew 27:40ff) and it was his death that sheared the curtain that concealed the Holy of Holies in half from top to bottom (the top to bottom tear symbolizes God coming to humanity to remove all barriers to his presence).  Moreover, followers of the resurrected Jesus have become not only his body on earth, they have become a dwelling place for God.  Ephesians 2:21 states, "In him [Jesus] the whole structure is joined together and grows into a holy temple in the Lord..."  The presence of God now lives within the individual hearts and the community that confesses Jesus as Lord.  Living out this confession is not incumbant upon a centralized sacred structure or a professional priesthood.  Living out this confession is incumbant upon investing in a community committed to sacrifice, generosity, mutuality, worship, study, and prayer.  The edifice that dictates our faith does not bear an address; it bears scars.

Was Jesus Seeker Sensitive? - Part 2

In Mark 2:15-17 Jesus is having dinner with a social outcast identified as Levi the tax collector.  Some of the religious elite notice Jesus kicking it with Levi and his many tax-collector/sinner friends and they want to know why.  Jesus responds, "Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick; I have come to call not the righteous but sinners."  Jesus is not seeker sensitive he is sinner sensitive.

The new reality - the Kingdom of God - that Jesus has ushered into existence through his life, death, and resurrection is a gift offered to all of humanity and not just those who are "seeking" God.  Romans 5 tells us that God proves his love for us in that while we were not seeking him he was seeking us.  God has acted on behalf of you and me before we even knew we needed someone to act on our behalf.  The penetrating reality of the Kingdom of God is not dependent upon my searching or seeking after it.  The Kingdom of God expressed through Jesus is a reality actively seeking those who aren't seeking it.

There once existed a reality that now looks like a dream.  It was a reality in which love, honor, mutuality, wholeness, and peace defined God's relationship with humanity, humanity's relationship with itself, and humanity's relationship with all of creation.  That dream has once again become a reality through Jesus and it is offered for the entire world...as we Christians like to say, "For God so love the WORLD that he..." 

God is not sensitive only to seekers he is sensitive to sinners like me.  14 years ago God didn't meet me in a church coffee shop, he met me in a bar.  He didn't meet me through a Christian radio station, he met me through the mysticism of Bob Marley.  He didn't meet me through an annual revival, he met me through a hospital emergency room.  He didn't meet me in a Worship Center, he met me in a county jail.  God didn't meet me because I was seeking him, he met me because he was seeking me.

The Good News is that there is a God who doesn't wait for us to seek him before he seeks us. The Good News is that a dream has become a reality, and I don't know about you, but I'm tired of dreaming.

Was Jesus Seeker Sensitive? - Part 1

Of late, I have become convinced that Jesus was anything but seeker sensitive: "If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me" (Mark 8:34). He repeatedly admonished individuals and groups to give up their wealth, religious traditions, vocations, and family relations to follow him. There was no 1,000 seat amphitheater in Capernaum where Jesus attempted to attract to himself droves of religious explorers with his 1st century beatnik/hipster style and his life-of-the-party miracles. There is no evidence in Scripture that Jesus registered visitors during the Sermon on the Mount, or handed out coffee outside the synagogue (though feeding the 5,000 was a sweet "First Impression"), or called church members when their attendance or giving declined. Jesus presented and embodied the in-breaking of a new reality - "the Kingdom of God has come near." This was not a new religious ideology or philosophical summae; it was a claim on the nature of existence and being, a claim on reality itself. Jesus quite simply gave his life to proclaiming, modeling, and ushering in a new reality. His call to follow is not merely a call to right thinking or right behavior; it is a call to a new reality characterized by peace, love, wholeness, life, repentance, forgiveness, grace, sacrifice, justice, truth, and reconciliation. One cannot make more palatable or inviting or inoffensive the truth or nature of reality itself. It is what it is. Jesus proclaimed, modeled, and ushered in a new reality that is what it is and no cross-less worship center, skinny jeans, or double latte will change that.