Saturday night I attended my 20 year high school reunion. In the days leading up to the big event, I couldn't help falling victim to the "Reunion Syndrome." The Reunion Syndrome is a condition characterized by increased self-reflection about the following: 1. Do I make enough money? 2. Is my house big enough? 3. Is my car adequately luxurious? 4. Does my job afford me position and influence? 5. Are my kids destined for greatness? The Reunion Syndrome is commonly reffered to as "Jonesing for the Joneses."
As the Reunion Syndrome took affect, I was surprised and saddened by my degree of Jonesing for the Joneses. I felt my self-worth rise and fall as I reflected on those standards our society holds so dear - physical beauty, wealth, material possessions, and power. Eventually a hidden apetite was revealed. I hungered to be great. I hungered to be extraordinary. A shadow of guilt and regret enveloped me as I remembered the words of Mother Teresa, “We cannot do great things on this Earth, only small things with great love.”
At the reunion, I felt awkward. My attempts at small talk were clumsy, gangly, and uncoordinated like I was in the throws of social puberty. I did want to know were people lived, if they had a family, and where they worked. But more than this I wanted to know how they had experienced the presence of God in their lives. Had they seen God in the birth of a child, an unforeseen tragedy, or an undeserved blessing? Had they seen God in the mundane and the monotonous or had they too been Jonesing for the Joneses? Had they too been hungering to be extraordinary?
I wish I could say I were no longer infected with the "Reunion Syndrome." I wish I could say that my life were filled with small things done with great love. Maybe just maybe by the next reunion I'll be living a life more ordinary.
2 comments:
we are so harsh on ourselves...i have been in the depths of reunion syndrome. 'Being ourselves', our real self, is silly or uncomfortable for us.
Where as you think you are clumsy, gangly, and uncoordinated...I view it as REAL which shows no pretense or self-patting pride.
Even your pondered questions twinkle with your compassion for the BEST relationship for them. In your witness weakness is your strength, my pastor, my friend.
My favorite quote is from Helen Keller...one who helped lead me to my love of sign language and praising God through it...she said:
"....accomplish a great and noble task...but it is my chief duty to accomplish small tasks as if they were great and noble."
Your Daddy saw His love in you and we do, too!
Susan Kirkman ;D
Hey Allen, read much on missional/new monastic lifestyles lately? I'm becoming more and more convinced that the best, although not the only, way to find and reveal God is in the ordinary.
School reunions, much like Sunday church services, are event-mentality driven. Everyone grabs their best clothes, puts on their best faces, and shows up, leaving the darkness and brokenness of life behind. Those two aspects of life are only to be found in the ordinary, day to day walk with people, as we reflect the light of Christ into both their darkness and brokenness.
Knowing you, my friend, I trust your walk to be both light and healing balm.
Keep going.
Dan
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