On Monday of this past week I was getting my son out of the car in order to take him to preschool when an older church member pulled to a stop behind my car and rolled her window down. She began to inform me that I should not have worn jeans the day before while serving Communion. She let me know that she could not permit such a thing. I truly was speechless, but to her credit she was forthright and appropriate in her tone and demeanor. Needless to say, as the day progressed I became more incensed by her comments regardless of the manner in which they were shared. My frustration was becoming palpable for two specific reasons.
First she neglected to give me the benefit of the doubt. Rather than assuming that maybe there was a reason other than perceived "poor judgment" or "disrespect" that may have necessitated my wearing jeans, this individual failed to engage me as a person who has a family, thirty-six years of life experience, and a profound respect for the membership of our congregation and its leadership. Little did she know that I was wearing jeans because my house had literally flooded a week earlier while I was at our annual men's retreat and I had been living with my pregnant wife and two sons at a family member's home.
Some whom I have shared this story have told me that I could have explained to the member the predicament that necessitated my choice of wardrobe. It was a "teachable moment," but that is not the body of Christ nor the character of our Lord and Savior. As the body of Christ we are a community of sinners being redeemed and transformed by the love, mercy, and grace of the God who willingly became a homeless vagabond for our sake. God has never set before us any standard or criteria that we must meet before he could share with us his everlasting love. In fact the opposite is true. As Romans 5:8 states, "God proves his love for us in that while we still were sinners Christ died for us." Or my translation, "While we were broken, battered, and wholly estranged from God, Jesus died for us." Yes while we were tattooed, pierced, cursing, and wearing jeans God came to us so that we could once again go to him.
The work of Christ on our behalf fuels the second aspect of my frustration. At our church we are in the midst of two integrated teaching and preaching series that are focused on the needs of our community and the marks of a missional church. In the latter series we are exploring the traits and characteristics of a church that is attempting to live beyond its walls. Subsequently we are studying in the former series the particular needs that are contronting our community so that our "mission," our "service," our "outreach" will be timely, appropriate, and effectual. You can imagine my sense of frustration when I became the direct recipient of a church member's inabillity to make the connection between our corporate teaching/preaching and her personal preference. We are immersed in probing and discerning the presence of Christ and the work of God in our community, yet within the body of Christ we are unable to demonstrate the foreberance, patience, and mercy that enabled us to become members of Christ's body. It is this inability to transfer the grace we have received that begins to explain in some measure why mainline churches like the United Methodists are hemorraging thousands of members each year.
1 comment:
I appreciate your perspective, I think I would have reacted the very same way.
I can't tell you how many times I have assisted in communion with jeans on. It never even occurred to me that someone would take offense to this, in my opinion the act of coming to the table is not impacted by what I have on, it should be impacted by what I take in, the representation of Christ's ultimate sacrifice for me.
I have had some of my most powerful worship experiences as I served communion, and I never once saw the cloths of those I served,nor do I feel that the experience is lessened in anyway by what I chose to wear as well.
In my many years as a layperson in various leadership positions, it has been my experience that no matter what you do or how you do it there are always going to be those who will find fault with what you do.
It can be hard to shake off, but I always try to remember that as long as I am allowing God to direct my decisions then what other people think is not really that important.
I am sorry that you had an unplesant experience with one of our own.
I can assure that I for one found nothing wrong with your attire.
Blessings
Robin
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